It was painful to hear

「日本は今ホントやばいから帰ってこないほうが良いよ！」

「日本から出ようとしてる若者が沢山いる！」

I called Japan home for many years. Thought I might live there forever at one point.

To hear this said to someone near and dear to me didn't really come as a surprise, but it still kinda hurt. Hurt? Maybe disappointing is a more accurate way to put it?

Hurt or disappointed. Either way it makes what could be my future a little bit more difficult. We had always planned on living in Japan again. My in-laws are getting older and starting to have health issues. Still independent at this point, but the time for us to be closer is drawing near.

My in-laws are kind and caring people. They have treated me with respect and welcomed me into the family.

I want to be there for them when they need it. I want to help them and they deserve all the help we can give them.

But now with our own children, would they disadvantaged by moving back to Japan? The bullying, xenophobia, racism are all things that I would expect and expect my kids to overcome because they are intelligent, strong and generally pretty likable. Them being bilingual and even trilingual is great, but perhaps the other parts of living in Japan aren't as much of a draw anymore. Perhaps our extended visits are the way to go. Long enough to really keep the connection, but still have somewhere else to come home to.

"Home is where the heart is" makes me think that perhaps I don't have a home right now.